Ted Lasso is a sports comedy drama series developed by Jason Sudeikis, Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, and Joe Kelly for AppleTV+. The series follows the titular Ted (Sudeikis), an American college football coach who is hired to lead an English soccer team. He tries to win over the team with his overly optimistic attitude, even though he is a bit of a fish out of water and not well acquainted with the sport.
Season 3 of Ted Lasso will likely be its final, according to star Brett Goldstein. Earlier this summer, per Deadline, the series was, in fact, in the middle of filming its final episode. Ultimately, one of the biggest appeals of the show lies in Ted’s quotes and the comedic delivery of his one-liners. Indeed, here are the best Ted Lasso quotes, ranked.
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8 “If God would have wanted games to end in a tie, she wouldn’t have invented numbers.”
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They key to the success of Ted Lasso is the humorous one-liners and the titular character’s comical optimism. This quote sums up his over the top attitude and shows how passionate he is for his team to win. There’s a certain charm to it that really illustrates how he was able to win over his team and, for that matter, audiences as well.
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7 “Old people are so wise. They’re like tall Yodas.”
Ted doesn’t have all the funny lines in the show; of course, other character have their share of jokes, which is why Ted Lasso was a hit with critics and audiences alike. This line is spoken by Jamie, who has a kind of childlike curiosity that leads to him coming out with some comical lines that make us warm up to him, bringing out an endearing side to his character.
6 “I think that you might be so sure that you’re one in a million, that sometimes you forget that out there you’re just one in 11.”
Ted says this line near the end of season 2 of Ted Lasso, when he still doesn’t know too much about soccer and is trying to learn the ropes of the game. He remains optimistic even though he is pretty much clueless on the topic of soccer. Even though he knows little about the game, he’s able to utilize his people and management skills to rally them together. In this scene, he breaks through to Jamie and the team can finally move forward.
5 “If the Internet has taught us anything, it’s that sometimes it’s easier to speak our minds anonymously.”
This Ted Lasso quote sums up the humorous tone of the series, where ridiculous lines are spoken in a serious way by over-the-top characters. This is an example of this, where a funny line is spoken in a serious way, enhancing the comedy.
4 “I don’t drink coffee. My mother always says I was born caffeinated.”
Dani Rojas is a member of AFC Richmond, and is cheerful and always excited. He relays this Ted Lasso quote from his mother, which is a spot-on perception of his character. Dani is self-aware of how intense he can be, and this quote is perfect for summing up his character.
3 “Boy, I love meeting people’s moms. It’s like reading an instruction manual as to why they’re nuts.”
This is an example of a Ted Lasso quote that makes you laugh out loud due to how funny and inherently true it is. This is a great observation about characters on the show, and can also be applied to situations in a lot of people’s real world, which makes the line even better.
2 “One day, I was driving my little boy to school, and I saw this quote by Walt Whitman, and it was painted on the wall there. It said, ‘Be curious, not judgmental.’ I like that.”
This Ted Lasso quote is one of the more emotional ones in the series, and it is spoken after Rebecca’s ex-husband Rupert works his way into the owner’s box. Ted fools Rupert into thinking that he has never played darts before and recites a speech when he beats him, which actually has depth to it and feels quite moving.
1 “You know what the happiest animal on Earth is? It’s a goldfish. You know why? It’s got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish, Sam.”
This Ted Lasso quote is not just funny, but also a good piece of advice to take forward in life. The line is spoken when Richmond is facing wins as well as defeats. Lasso’s advice is good, asking them to focus on the moment and not look back.
